Genius Guide for Getting Guys

Well here at Chocolate Thunder we like to not blog about our lives because to be honest... our lives suck. So what we do is post random entries about important features of life. I mean we could talk about how Australia sucks at everything now or rant about Ryan Reynolds winning sexiest man alive for 2010... BUT NO! DUE TO POPULAR REQUEST WE HAVE CREATED THE GENIUS GUIDE FOR GETTING GUYS! Hope you like it :D

Girls do not need to seek a target, as usually they only seek out after guys they are physically attracted, so finding one is rare...unless Wilson is in the room.

Guys look for cute. This is probably the most important fact for a girl to know. If the guy had a choice between a girl in a pikachu suit or a girl in a muk suit... THEY WOULD GO WITH THE PIKACHU SUIT! But as Mr Dillon says natural talent will only get so far which is totally correct in my eyes. Having a cute face will only get you so far in this field. It is often mistaken that a genius is born, not made. Such said, does NOT apply in physical appearance!

Lets face it ladies... the chance of the guy liking you back is slim. With this... the guy can not stop thinking about you day and night

In this blog, we like to keep things as simplistic and logical as possible so therefore we have created formulas with the assistance of mathematics to guide our dear readers.

The guy's level of cuteness/hotness can be labelled as x

Your level of cuteness has to be x^2 in order to grab his attention at first sight
Note: These relationships are usually the most unstable and dysfunctional. It's rare for one of these to last for over 1 night.

If your level of cuteness is x, talk to the guy and you'll most likely hit it off
Note: This is generally true but you should always have a backup plan! Besides you may think you fit here but you might fit actually at the x^1/2 level so it is always worth it to read ahead.

If your level of cuteness is x^1/2, then you're going to need all the help you can get
This is where we will be focusing our analysis today. If you land here, looks is not your forte, were gonna boost your PERSONALITY! If you can pull it off, your looks should not matter at the end of the day.
-First off
Observe your man you are eying. Is he a geek who's never had a GF before? because, CHANCES ARE he will JUMP at the thought of having a GF.
If he regularly participates in DotA and does NOT regularly talk to girls he is what we call, an easy catch.
-Then
If the guy is a tough customer you may have to resort to cruder methods. Playing hard to get seems to be the most successful way to interest a guy Playing hard to get WORKS! Every heterosexual guy is turned on by lesbians. Why? Because we can't get them simple as that.
Note: For all guys reading this... PLEASE DO NOT THINK THIS GUIDE WORKS IN REVERSE. I MEAN... YOU'LL PROBABLY GET BITCH SLAPPED.
-Finally
If the guy is pulling moves on you already then you know he's into you and the rest should be a smooth ride.
Note: If this step doesn't occur you know that somewhere you made a crucial error BUT HAVE NO FEAR. Guys have memories like goldfish. If you fail today, you can try again tomorrow. :D

If your level of cuteness is x^1/3, aim lower
Note: Do not feel too disheartened... your life probably lies somewhere more worthwhile than here like at Troung or... at some Greenday concert.

This concludes our entry. It's not as in depth as we thought it would be but its almost 1 am and everyone loves to sleep :D

P.S Hands off Alvin Yap